Lesson Learned Well
One thing that I remember most when I made clippies yesterday & my mom’s around, she dictate me while I’m doing things.
“you shouldn’t do that”
“it looks awful”
“you should do this”
And so on.
Did u get my point? All of them was a Negative word. Well at least it has negative effect on me.
At first I kept silence while she’s commenting me. But then I just couldn’t bear it. All those pressure from my younghood.
“mom I never look doing good in front of you, right. all I have made always consisting mistake & you always pointing on my mistake. you never appreciate what I have made. just like my school year. always like that”.
There’s a long pause after that. I hope she got the point. But I don’t care if she doesn’t.
She knows that I’m not that kinda type who will be accelerated when compared to other. I’m the girl who will break down & fall apart in revenge when compared.
Everytime those negative words spilled from her always success to make me feel like I never achieve something good.
Friends & people may see me as an attractive, fussy, noisy & happy me. While sometimes I put those mask to cover my insecure & not confidence feeling.
A lesson learnt very well on that day. I will not treat my kiddos the same. All of their small achievement is important for me.
I have to bear in mind that my kiddos ‘value’ is different from my ‘value’. I should honour theirs.
Appreciation is needed. It will always will. Especially parents appreciation.
I have to be a supportive parents. I have to. I need to.
I need to appreciate myself.